Wednesday, October 21, 2009

are you from crazy town

sorry, this is loooooooong...
deleted post, due to respect

73 comments:

Tatiana said...

Holy cow girl! That is some rough time drama! I'm sorry you have to go through all of this! Maybe she had one too many drinks that night! But I think I would have come really close to smacking her too if she would have said that to me. I hope she gets over it by the time you decide what you want to do about your wedding.

chelsea said...

That is tough! Speaking from the outside, she has no right to put YOU in the middle, and you're right. It's your day, and you need to invite who all the people important to YOU not her...she can put it aside for at least one day! Trust me, people will come out of the word work with unsolicited opinions during the planning process. stay strong and remember what the day is about. My blog today might interest you today :)

Becky said...

That is crazy!! Maybe (if it ever comes up again) you should remind her who ended up with your brother! SHE did, not your bestie! Therefore, she shouldn't have a problem flaunting that around her if you will. Plus, that was a while ago, so who cares. There are much more important things in the picture now. Like your cute little nephew. It is time for her to put her grudges aside.

PaigeR530 said...

Man, it sounds like she needs a lesson in forgiveness! I'm sorry she put you in the middle like that, that's not right! I'm glad you all have made peace, but you are right. She has no input on your wedding guests-you all are family, and she needs to support you! I hope things get better!

The Neffs said...

Wow, what a night! I am so sorry for your sis in law that the kiss occured. I am sure that was very hurtful. But, I agree with you it is in the past. As you said they haven't even seen your bestie since. As far as the wedding, it will be your day and she will have to set aside her feelings for your bestie and focus on the purpose which is celebrating you and your sweetheart and your love!

carrie1 said...

Eekkk... that is crazy town!

Sorry she put that burden on you, it's never a good situation. =(

But that drama happens every where.. at my wedding reception my family and my ex in laws got into a HUGE brawl! The funny thing is before that night our familys got along.... I didn't find out about the incident until we got back from the honeymoon when my ex's parents were driving us home from the airport!

Now thats crazy town!!

Mallory said...

boo on selfish DM!
How dare she threaten you (meaning threaten not to come or bring Dom)!!
That would make me so mad, and you have every right to still be upset about it. It's going to be YOUR day, you can have whomever you please by your side, without having to feel guilty. SO DON'T.
:( major sad faces to DM for putting you in that position.
Hope it gets better doll!<333

CTB said...

Good grief girlie! That stinks that she is putting you in this awkward place. I hope she is able to get over her own insecurities soon and leave you out it.

Jennifer said...

I think she has every right in the world to dislike your friend. BUT I don't agree with refusing to be at your wedding. That's not fair and puts you in a crappy predicament, forcing you to choose. You shouldn't have to. Hopefully by the time your wedding does come around, her heart will be softened and this won't be an issue. Sometimes you have to just bite the bullet for your best friend. I've had to do it too many times to count. And I think they should do it for you. :)

KLaw said...

Oh that shit just sucks! I'm sorry. Drinking always brings out the jealous ass in me, but I'd never say that to my future sister in law. Yikes!

brittany said...

dear lord that must be hard being stuck in the middle of that sitch. HOWEVER, I hope your future sis in law comes to her senses and sacks up for the wedding out of respect for you. that's the least she could do.

thanks for sharing, makes me feel a little better about the issues between my brother's girlfriend and me...like we're not the only ones... ha!

DeDe said...

So sorry to hear that happened to you. In the end, I hope that DM will realize that the day is not about her and her past, it is about You and your fiance joining your lives together. Smile!

Kelly said...

Ouch! Sometimes too much to drink + a general feeling to fight can be a lethal combo! I've definitely had one (ONE!) "crazy hose beast" night (as my friends and husband like to call it) where I went nuts, ha. What I hate is that 1) can anyone REALLY vouch for the way they act at 21?? I dunno about you, but I was such a child at that age still and 2) I always hate how people always blame the GIRLS in a cheating situation... do they not realize that it's a two way street (no offense to your bro of course! :-)) I hope she moves on and takes her agression out on someone else!

Aishlea and Brandon said...

Wow.... I don't know how you handled that so well! I think I might would have slapped her! It is totally unfair for her to put you in the middle like that. Hopefully without alcohol in her system, she can be a big girl for your wedding and put aside her differences to support you and be there for you on YOUR DAY- no matter when it is or what you choose to do! I'm so sorry girl......

Lindsey said...

Oh my! That is def some drama you poor girl! I agree with you, nobody can tell you who can and cannot come to YOUR wedding! Hold strong if you have to, but when the time comes I hope and pray you do not have to go through this madness!

Alison said...

Aww hun that sucks! I don't get along very well with my sister-in-law (she's a big fan of snide comments) so I know how you feel. It's nice that generally speaking you guys are friends though... :(

Hayley said...

If she can't grow up and be an adult for her sister-in-law/friend's wedding (yours), then she's not a good friend. That's just plain freaking stupid. I have a theory that real feelings and thoughts come out while intoxicated, albeit they may be exaggerated.

People need to get over stuff. Hopefully if it comes down to it and she's still acting like a child, your brother won't be a pansy like mine is and will put his foot down about your nephew attending.

Sorry about your drama! You seem too sweet to have to deal with crap like that.

AmberDenae said...

Wow! What an interesting situation. Sorry about that crazy drama. Hopefully everything works out! Kind of ridiculous that she would state that she and your nephew would not be at your wedding. Seems very selfish to me. Hopefully that will not be the case! :)

Whitney said...

Oh lady, I am soo sorry! That is awful :( Not that I know anything really more about the situation but I feel like DM must be very insecure in the relationship. She must feel as though your bestie is a threat and she could possibly steer your brother in her direction if wanted... now, like I said that may not be the case but I feel as though that is maybe her thoughts. And she probably hasn't dropped it because it still hurts her deeply

SG said...

She needs to get the F over it and if she doesn't come to your wedding fine but for her to not allow your nephew to come is just wrong! She can't tell you who you can and can't invite!

Unfortch I have a similar family issue with my sister in law (my brother's wife) she and my mom DO NOT get along and she has said that she's not sure if she's coming to my wedding (I don't care if she comes) however if she doesn't come that means my two nieces can't come either which I DO care about. I think things have gotten better b/w her and my mom so hopefully it will all work out but I haven't gotten any confirmation yet either way.

Sorry you have to deal with this. Families suck sometimes.

Tights Lover said...

Your wedding should be about YOU and your husband. It's too bad that she's put you in that situation. I'm sure you have enough other stress to deal with while planning. Hopefully everything works out okay.

Kentucky Blonde said...

daang, that's not a fun night! i hope DM realizes that it's YOUR day, not hers! but regardless of the wedding aspect, she should forgive and forget. she can't avoid your bestie forever...she should take the opportunity to be the bigger person and forgive her! it's not easy but it makes things better in the long run! anyways- you're great and i hope can she get over it! keep smilin and bein the bestest aunt to little dom! :)

Annie said...

DRAMA!! She should NOT be putting you in that situation. I mean..it was 3 years ago! Get over it...Yes, that is a crappy situation...but it was SO long ago!!

SO sorry that you have to deal with it! What a bummer :(
Hopefully when you guys DO get married she can grow up and they YOU have YOUR day!!

The SSS Sophisticate said...

Yikes! What an awkward position she put you in! She defintely has some built up anger and needs to let go of the situation. If she doesn't go to your wedding because of her then she will regret it forever.

Miss Kriss said...

Ohh, girlie. That is such a tough situation. I would hate to be in your shoes. But it sounds like you handled it very rationally. You're right to point out that your wedding is your special day and that you are the one who ultimately determines who will and will not be invited. I feel bad for DM that the kiss occurred and if it happened to me, I would probably have a good bit of animosity toward the friend as well. But the damage has been done and in a situation like this, you are the one who ultimately stands to get hurt. Hang in there, girlie. It sounds like DM realizes how fabulous you are which is why she apologized. It will all work itself out. You'll see. :)

bananas. said...

oh so that was the drama...well i'm guessing alcohol has a lot to do with that little sitch but if she was being honest then i have to say she really needs to get over it at least for a day...your day. a wedding is about the couple and if she loves you, your brother and her son, she would be there. i think she will but still, it didn't need to go down like that.

Kaitlin said...

Wow. Sorry that is frustrating. Everything will work out, we had lots of drama and everyone was fine (all parties warned though). You have every right to be a little bothered by the situation.

katie + bret said...

For the love - Throw in some politics and abortion talk and your night would have been good to go! ;)

I am sure all will be well at the wedding!

Iva said...

eekk! well...I think alcohol played a big part in this...I think that when your day comes, she will have to let it be. The past is in the past...this will be your day; and for you, they will all be there, on your special day :)

Those Magic Slippers Will Take You Home said...

Yeah, Drama! You said it! She must be insecure or something? and it's not all the girls fault... it takes 2 to tango! but you're right, she needs to be civil and chill out. This was years ago! I feel bad for you to be put in that situation. not fare! Everything will pan out in time. :oD

Lil' Woman said...

Wow that's nuts...I could understand not liking the girl but as far as making decisions about your future wedding and guests...that's is craziness.

Danielle said...

Hold the phone! You have this great, hilarious, interesting blog and almost NOBODY that you know reads it?! Amazing.

Anyway...I'm sorry you had a rough night with DM but I'm glad it all got worked out. Everyone has wedding drama, whether it be minor or a big ol' blow up. It's how you handle it that matters.

Kym said...

booo to drama! :( sorry you had to go through that annie! i agree with you that people shouldn't hold grudges... i has to learn the hard way that the PAST IS THE PAST and holding on to it will just keep you in the past and not let you move forward in life. i really hope she learns to forgive your best friend...

drollgirl said...

eke! she sounds like a NUT! maybe she was drunk?!?!?! even so, sheesh! it is your wedding, and you determine the guest list. if someone doesn't want to show up, i guess that is their problem. yikes! she really sounds a bit nutty to me!

Ashley said...

WOW! That's rough. I really think it's time for her to let it go. Especially since it's been three years and your brother wasn't seen this girl since that happened. I hope everything calms down and she won't blow up again!

A Real Housewife said...

totally should have slapped her. she has no right. none.

Sarah Ann said...

I'll be honest, if I were her, I wouldn't let it go either. I'm a super jealous person and I would want to hit your best friend every time I saw her. BUT I would NEVER tell you who you could or could not have at your wedding or say that my family wouldn't be attending because of her. That goes beyond the line. I'd say she was probably over emotional from drinking and that while that's probably what she really does feel like doing, I doubt she actually would because I know I feel the same way about things but would never actually act upon what I was thinking.

Carol said...

Whoa!! That was totally out of line in my opinion! Just remember, it is YOUR day!

OceanDreams said...

So crazy love, you deserve only the best and she should have not said those things to you, you are totally being understanding despite the situation. I had a similar situation happen to me, not about a wedding (I am not even engaged lol) but my friend went off on me about my BF and said some really hurtful things and I have totally been there for her. It hurt and I am glad that you are being kind and forgiving, but it still hurts none the less. Well, props to you lady for being the bigger person, hope your day is super special!

brown eyed girl said...

Damn, Gina. Someone needs to move on. It's been more than two years, if she can forgive your brother and stay with him, she should do the same for bestie, they both are 50% of the incident, you know?

But in all honesty, my mother in law and father in law are not "okay" with the rest of my husbands family. So there was a lot of "we're not coming if they're coming" bullcrap going on. In the end, they all came and the peace was maintained. It's all about you, your husband, your wedding, that's it, nevermind them. I was just like you, freaking out about it and letting it get to me, but it's truly, truly, truly not worth it.

Chinnup! xo

Tracy-Girl said...

This is such a complicated situation... but I agree with you. I think that DM just has to accept that mistakes happen. She doesn't have to forgive her or even speak to her, but there is no reason that she should selfishly miss your big special day because she doesn't want to be within 500 feet of your bestie. I understand the situation is sort of sticky, but it was years ago!

Kristi (sweet cheeks) said...

Ah, so sorry you are having to deal with that...that is ridiculous. It is YOUR WEDDING. Invite whoever you want, but remember that the day is about you are Billy and nobody else. Hugs girlie! xoxo

Suzanne said...

Sounds like someone did have a one way ticket to crazy town that night. I'm sorry that happened to you. You seem like the sweetest ever and totally didn't deserve it!

Jorden and Kristin said...

oh my goodness! if my ex-bestie from highschool had a son i'd think you were talking about her! sounds about right! haha

Bunnie said...

Wow, this is a pretty exciting intro to your blog! I was totally into it like some kind of captivating novel! I feel angry inside for you - I would have been SO mad at DM! You're right, who does she think she is! At least she apologized though. Talk about family drama.
It's unfortunate that she's still so angry at your bestie even though she's tried to make amends. However, your wedding is to celebrate you and B's happiness - if you guys are important to her, she should definitely set her own issues aside and be happy for you guys!

On a brighter note, cute blog :)

xo

Lynn said...

I agree, forgive and move on. The forgetting part is often easier said than done but forgivness is a must if you want to heal and move forward. She doesn't have a right to dictate your guest list. And sometimes, as mature adults, we just have to suck it up and do things we don't always want to do, including being at a social function with someone we aren't that fond of.

mommywonderland said...

Wow..Its all I can muster up to say.. Im so sorry for drama..dont you hate it??? We have your back lady love that is for sure..NO one messes with our Annie :(

Adorably Distracted... said...

Wow! I would be upset also. Even though I can kind of understand why she is upset, I don't think she should have ever put you in the middle like that. It's not your fault what happened and it's your wedding, not hers. I hope everything stays calm with that whole situation! sorry girly! love ya!

Kristin said...

Hey there :) I've been following you for a while on here (that sounds creepy, didnt mean for it to be! Haha!).. anyways, I am also getting married soon and I'm just gonnna warn ya- planning a wedding really shows everyones true colors. I've learned so many new things (good and bad) about who my true friends are and which family members I can trust. I think you have every right to be upset, I know I would be! But at the same time.. think about if the same thing happened to you. What if DM's best friend kissed your fiance? I know if my sister-in-laws best friend kissed my fiance I would be livid and probably punch her if I ever saw her.. Just try to talk it out with her, she shouldnt have said that your nephew can't go to the wedding- that is just wrong. Chalk it up to her being drunk and hopefully she can be civil for your sake :) Also, don't worry about not having wedding plans yet.. enjoy your engagement! When the fiance and I get married in May, we will have been engaged for 2 1/2 years :) It's good to take your time and not rush into it. Good luck with everything!

Love Lace said...

I hope that she's able to be enough at ease with the situation that when you actually have a date set she will let your nephew come. Don't let it ruin this exciting time in your life! Keep your head up!

Katie said...

I'm sorry girl! That sucks, she really took it to a mean place by saying she won't go to your wedding. I'm sure when you do get married she will hopefully be adult enough to put her grudges aside...

Selma said...

This is crazy. Remind her (if this ever comes up again) that she ended up with your brother! And your wedding is your wedding and you are going to decide who's invited or not. Then again, I hope this never comes up again. It's just silly. It's not like it happened three months ago...but years! Oh boy. I'll keep my fingers crossed though. :D Don't let it ruin your life! OK?! Okay!!!!

Jon and Steph said...

Wow, I am so sorry! That's really terrible of her to act like that. Yes I am sure that it is hard to forget something like that, but when it comes to you and your feelings on your wedding day, she should totally put that aside and act like a grown up! I hope everything works out!

Mitzi G.!! said...

So sorry for the drama!! Apparently she is still hurt by what your brother did & it is something that they need to talk about & work out on their own & NOT get you involved in it. You have no control over what other people do or don't do BUT you do get to control your wedding plans & guest list!!

On a side note though...that is really crappy of your bro & your best friend to do that to her ESPECIALLY since she was pregnant at the time. There are so many emotions & feelings running through your head at that time not to mention your body changing & getting bigger.....I know I felt unattractive at certain times while pregnant & it would have crushed me if my hubby did that to me!!

SassyCassie said...

Oh wow, that really sucks. I hope she chills out and everyone can come to the wedding when you decide to have it.

Lauren Kelly said...

WOW, life throws you curve balls and that was a curve ball my friend!!! But I'm with you, life's way short to dwell in the past!!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Ew, that's rough! That's such a hard position to be in. I guess only time will tell as it gets closer and closer to your big day what will actually happen. I hope things work out the best way possible.

Michelle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michelle said...

DRAMA! DRAMA! DRAMA! cant live with it cant live without it! me personaly i probably would of hit the bitch ahaha jk but i did get into a fist fight with my sis-in-law. pretty crazy but its all still good in the hood we are still friend, what can i say shes the mother of my nephew .

it sucks she put you in the middle like that. and i bet she remebers asking and what happened she just doesnt want to feel stupid. i hope she gets over her period and comes to her sences. its not her right to tell you whose coming to YOUR wedding and whose not. just go BRIDZILLA on her jk. but on a real note dont let her take your special day away just becuase she wants to pout about something that happened 3 years ago. i hope she attends your wedding and i hope its not going to be round 2 at your wedding. good luck girly <3

KC said...

Oh Annie! I'm so sorry you had to go through that! She has some serious commitment or trust issues and she's trying to project her problems on you. Keep your chin up and try not to worry!

Chloé said...

oh man! that is crazy! that is really hard situation to be in! but it is your wedding and you are allowed to invite whoever you want! she should respect that!

The Rest is Still Unwritten said...

Oh wow! How awful! If she can forgive your brother, she should forgive your BF as well. I'm so sorry, when you're thinking about your wedding this is definitely not something you should have to deal with!

short southern momma said...

dang girl! are we related?? I feel your pain, people just need to grow up! Hope it all works out and that you have an awesome weekend! = )

.:*aMbAr*:. said...

WOW!!!!!!! I know what you mean. But HOWEVER, I have never been in that position, obviously, but I'm kinda sidding [if that's the proper word] with her. I don't think I could EVER forget something like that, let alone forgive. But then again, I've never been in that position. Again, this was ages ago, and "bestie" apparently was genuine about her apologies, so she should not be bringing that up like it just happened.

Ela said...

Aw, sweetie, what a terrible night. It's so hard because from the sounds of it, I don't think she'll ever forgive your bestie. But by no means should the ruin your wedding or your wedding plans. I feel for you because you're stuck in the middle. I'm glad she apologized to you. I hope over time she will heal...and not put you in an awkward position again.
Take care, honey!

Kristin said...

WOW, it is so not fair to put you in the middle of that. Not the most mature thing I've ever heard about it. I hope she doesn't continue to make problems for you!

Kristen said...

I am so sorry!! That was definitely not right!! I mean it was a long time ago, it wasn't just your friends fault it was your brothers too. It makes me mad how sometimes people only put the blame on one person. And your BF tried to apologize. She seriously needs to drop it. Just move on! I am sorry, she had no right to put you in between that and to say she wouldn't go to your wedding. Not mature at all!

Blasé said...

I wish my life was more "peachy"!

Perfectly Imperfect said...

uh first of all, i think everyone should get a free pass for what they did when they were 21, i mean hello! who knew what they were doing then?!? second.. she should let it go. but she won't, because she's girl and girls don't let that crap go! third, don't even worry about it. invite them both. they'll both come, shoot daggers at each other if they must, but you won't care- you'll be getting married! and if you want, i'll come and be security. i do love a good chick fight!

kidding. but seriously, don't worry about it. she probably regrets saying it (because she does remember it, i don't buy that excuse EVER!) but won't apologize because then it has to be brought back up.

Kerry said...

omg i cant believe she said she wouldnt go to your wedding! thats quite immature! xx

Rachel H. said...

It's sad that sometimes people can't just let things like this go...it sounds like it's about time.

Jax said...

Oh no! Sorry a fun night turned into a dramafest. :( That's really lame of her to say...and then to keep.going.off.about.it. Sheeeesh.. let it go!!! *sigh*

Katie said...

Ugh....I'm sorry you have to deal with this drama, girl. I wish I had some advice for you....Stay strong. Try not to let it get to you.

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